I don't know how other bloggers manage to fill in post after post even when there's nothing to say or nothing to show or at least nothing thats show-able for whatever reason. I depend on having something to show so I won't have to say too much 'cause really I'm not all that interesting so when there's not much to show... I've got not much to say.
Lately I've had not much to show because the work I've been doing needs to be saved for release dates and some other work is for a proposal. See, I landed a literary agent a while back and have been working on stuff... a lot of writing and a lot of self-doubt.
Ya know, I swore to myself back at the beginning of this year, back when I decided to get moving and quit letting the personal stuff in my life affect the work I so terribly wanted to do... that this would be strictly a blog about knitting and sewing and such and that there'd be no more personal stuff. Tutorials are good and patterns are good and discussions on the different ways to cast on and bind off are good but the mire that is my emotional state some days should be far, far away from all this pretty yarn and fabric.
But I've come to realize that this grand plan of mine is what keeps me silent on the days there's nothing to show. That its all connected. That if I could throw a big squishy knit blanket over it all I'd be golden. But when the life you live is the result of divorce and death and trial by fire its hard to keep it all clean and neat and pretty. The complexities of being a parent in a broken and then re-blended home, and trying to be level headed and adult-like and responsible and strong are just too much to carry every day... day after day... and not get scuffed and scratched and scarred along the way. Getting lost in old anger, new boundaries, and everyone involved forgetting that above all we are all fragile and just people trying to do our best.
The stories I could tell. The things I would say. If this were something other than a knitting blog.
So I've been doing a lot of yank'in myself up by my bootstraps both literally and figuratively. The barn yard is thawing and therefore muddy and the goats are loving the recent sunshine. The kids were out after school walking them on halters because they have big plans to walk them at the lake this summer. That will be a sight.
The geese and the chickens are laying eggs and there's bits of green popping up here and there amongst the trees and fences.
I've been writing a lot and doing math a lot. And I've been knitting a little. Its not much but its enough to show... here on this knitting blog.
I, for one, don't expect a blog to read like a book. It's personal, and I expect to hear the personal, nitty-gritty details of YOU. Not so much what you're doing, knitting, sewing. I want the full package! I'm selfish like that.
Posted by: marissa | March 13, 2010 at 02:10 PM
Oh, wow! I used to follow your blog, all of the time. I think I've purchased almost all of your patterns. Then, awhile back, for some reason, I thought you had discontinued posting. This is the first time I've checked for a long time. Imagine my surprise, when I find all of the new additions to you designs! Yea! I'm buying three or four now! Thanks for being here!
Posted by: Debbie | March 12, 2010 at 05:35 PM
The Minute i get online i check your blog... even before checking my mail....I have become a Fan...I Love your Designs..Your Pictures....and especially the Tutorials.. Your Blog inspired me to Sew... :) ... Keep Posting !!
Posted by: Manseera | March 12, 2010 at 10:11 AM
I wish I had advice on how to keep the personal stuff from creeping in--but all I've been blogging about lately is poop. So I'm not the best help.
Posted by: bezzie | March 12, 2010 at 06:29 AM
Marie, you are my favorite "author!" I've been reading your blog for 3-4 years now. I love seeing all of your glorious designs emerge, but I also love the "personal" stuff. I check in on you almost daily...keep it coming! Congrats on landing a literary agent, how exciting!
Posted by: Lisa | March 11, 2010 at 11:54 PM
I love the personal stuff. I love the sense of community that it creates. I tend to forget the blogs where it's all just the end products - I enjoy seeing the "warts and all" process that goes into it (or keeps it from happening, in my case). And when you offer your patterns and products for purchase we all feel like we're supporting a friend when we buy them.
BTW: Hooray for imminent springtime!!!
Posted by: Amy | March 11, 2010 at 10:31 PM
I love your blog. I love knowing that I'm not the only one that let's my life impact my work. I love knowing that I'm not the only one who's life is messy. I love knowing that I'm not the only one tongue-tied without knittng to show. Thanks to your latest, Sparrow, I finally had something to show/blog!)
Posted by: Dani | March 11, 2010 at 07:57 PM
Oh, just let it all happen and write about it on your blog if you want to!!...I found your blog quite by accident when looking for some information on smocking to teach in a Children's Wear class, and have followed you ever since. All of our "stuff"--it all goes together and it is refreshing to hear someone else give voice so eloquently to how you cannot, no matter how much you'd like to, compartmentalize the work from the life. Kids and livestock and art and baking and heartache and sometimes humbug--we all have some subset of the same. Thanks for letting us know about yours:-)
Posted by: Lori | March 11, 2010 at 07:47 PM
I recently found your blog when doing a search for hand pleating. I enjoyed your tutorial and have loved your blog. Thank you for everything you share with us.
Posted by: Lauren | March 11, 2010 at 06:41 PM
I really enjoy your blog and check it daily. Knitting (really, really nice knitting), kids, life on the farm... Bring it on, I enjoy it all!
Posted by: Gail | March 11, 2010 at 12:07 PM